Becoming a better person do not mean you have to forget who you are, it entails forgetting what you are because it a copy and paste work generally called me-tooism, and embracing who you are and what you are made to do with who you are. It is clear that we become what we are not, but who we are, no matter how late no we forget it is an enhancement process that goes on on a regular basis. Some people live their lives everyday speedily forgetting who they are and giving everything that is more than required to what they are not.  That’s how they become the ‘what’ and totally lost the ‘who’.

Do you sometimes wonder why people refer to you as a changed person in an antagonistic way?

It is obvious that they can no longer tell who you are, so they doubt who you were and define you by what you are becoming. Happiness is the amount of joy you distribute on the daily. And how you give joy is to be happy and you become truly happy by knowing who you are (your purpose) and who you are is what you give and nothing else. In other words, you give what you are not when you living a life of who you are not. A furiously sad man don’t give joy unless he is a deranged environmental entertainer which means no matter how mad he gets, sane people tend to derive humor from it because he is operating in another dimension sane people can’t understand called insanity. In essence sadness do not bring joy whatsoever and happiness is the beauty of life.

  • I used to have this friend (tony), he is a very bad and bitter sadist. Always angry at everything, and amazingly he have no clear reason why. His parents as I get find out are jolly good fellows but the negative outcome of their son is an Unfathomable mystery. I tried to make him see how exciting life is, which is naturally my job to always lift spirits, but he couldn’t get himself to see it but complained bitterly about his inability to. As disappointing as it is to admit, but tony is a joy killer; whenever he comes around, the atmosphere of euphoria will be absorbed by his nagging and sad personality like a vacuum automatically. It was so bad that we learnt to avoid him and unfortunately he gained followers by influence. Couple of others even though when he is not around, they always question the good purpose of everything. I personally called them the “Thomas Hobbes’ people. Tony is intelligent but never bright. He excelled only in killing joy and replacing with a questions but no one to answer and he was very good at making  exclusive excuses.

All the need for Tony’s story is to illustrate the fact that, nothing good comes from negativity and to be a better person, you must let go of excuses and strive hard for integrity with the right choices you make.

How do you become a better person; here are tips on how and by living with these principles, there are no heights you can’t conquer and soar higher.

  1. Accepting who you are 

Acceptjng what you already have gives a strong and confident foundation to getting what you want. No matter how measly your financial life is, you alone have the power to accepting it and turning the tables around. Acceptance is hard to come by on a good day but fortunately it is a behaviour you have to and can nurture ( this will be treated in details soon). Here are ways to accept who you are:

  1. Set an intention. …
  2.  Celebrate your strengths. …
  3. Consider the people around you. …
  4. Forgive yourself. …
  5. Shush your inner critic. …
  6. Grieve the loss of unrealized dreams. …
  7. Perform charitable acts. …
  8. Realize that acceptance is not resignation.

More items will be outlined in details.

2. Believe in yourself 

Examine the greatest minds in history, you will find out that what they all have in common is their “I CAN” mentality because they believe in what they can do. Believe in yourself and you will become unstoppable and everything will become possible. Believing is the only way to get things to work; Belief is like a fuel that ignite your life and keep you moving. Total confidence in yourself is the quality you can develop to enhance your belief system so you can wax stronger. As soon as you trust and believe in yourself, you will learn how to live.

3.  Positive thinking 

Always having a positive attitude and outlook on life is a very crucial tip to becoming a better person. People naturally fall for authenticity and boldness. It is a charismatic thing that marvels the mind of many. Maintaining a positive balance in situations whether bad or good, with unshakable faith sucks up negative energy. You don’t expect yourself to come out positive whereas you nurture yourself in negativity. Thinking positively reduces the stress of any negative occurrences and when backed with faith, eliminate it completely.  Positive thinking is a mental and emotional attitude that focuses on the bright side of life and expects positive results.

Positive thoughts generates positive feelings and attract positive life experience

     4.  Be thankful and grateful 


Giving thanks and expressing gratitude brings about more favour. If you genuinely express it, it uproots barriers and causes things to work on your favour and it makes you feel better about life and how it is suppose to be. You show appreciation and gain recommendations; naturally people appreciate people that appreciate other people.

5.   Love your neighbors and bear no grudges

People that bear grudges are easily identified in the crowd, because their nature clearly define who they are and what their personality are made off. You bear grudges when you drag yourself into a competition, when you don’t feel good in your own skin and lay blames to feel better. You bear grudges when your hopes are cut short and this is one of the crucial reason why you should not put yourself in the position of hoping so much on people but yourself and God. Instead of waiting to be happy go out and work out a means. Learn to forgive and forget. It’s impossible to love who you hold grudges for and it practically don’t make you a good friend or acquaintances. Love yourself enough to know what’s good for you because that’s how you can love someone else. You can not give what you do not have and you receive what you give and that’s life. The more beauty you see in others, the more beautiful you become.

6. Redefine love

When you use the word ‘love’ what does it really mean to you? Redefining love brings a sense of liberating release in letting go of old beliefs and admitting and welcoming what it truly is. It’s about connecting with people on a human level and…wishing them well or just sharing something positive. You don’t need to be in a relationship or marriage to redefine love, it goes both ways. It’s a decision to stand with the natural principle of things no matter how belittling you feel it is. If you fuel your journey on the opinions of others, you are going to run out of gas.

7. Read! Read!! Read!!!

Do I have to read to become a better person you ask? Yes I say to you. Acquire knowledge wherever you can find it and where more can you find a vast collection of knowledge if not the library? In those pages, you live through your day majestically and emerge victorious. The 2nd book of Timothy says



All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:


In every information you pick up lies a possibility to enlightenment. You should be careful so you don’t get conterminated by poisonous books. Nobody knows it all, books are written to be read and you choose what must appeal to you and love the rest. A half-read book is a half-finished love affair. Knowledge is power.

8. Seek and speak the truth

The fear and unease that arise from mistrust and suspicion, seeing other people in terms of us and them, is not easily overcome by saying a prayer or closing your eyes. It’s real concern for others that breeds trust and leads to friendship and a sense of security–Dalai Lama. If you loose a friend for speaking the truth, the person was never your friend. Many people have a phobia for honesty and they try avoiding it and in turn deny their selves of authenticity. Master the art of being true in everything, you eliminate the negatives in your pack and gain more followers that make life safer.

9. Live life as it comes because it comes as you plan it

Complicated right? No it’s not. Everyday, minutes, seconds, and hours of your live counts. Make plans to position your life in a flexible way that you have enough time to achieve whatever you want. It’s sexy to be organised, it tells a lot about you. Your dressing can not hide how unorganised you are but it is a necessary thing in your journey to becoming a better person. You feel good and comfortable in yourself and you get addressed how you are dressed. Always remember that YOU are not what has happened to you. You are what you choose to become.

10. Your family/Friends 

The story of human intimacy is one of constantly allowing ourselves to see those we love most deeply in a new, more fractured light. Look hard. Risk that. Your family/friends is a very vital part of you, disconnecting from them do not make you a good team player because it have its ways of pulling you back and that is a thing you will have to avoid. Our lives generally begin in our family and the friends that we keep. We only shine bright to the world from home. Always make sure their happiness is always steadfast.

One of the most important of life’s lessons is to learn independence, to understand freedom. This means independence from attachments, from results, from opinions, and from expectations. Breaking attachments leads to freedom, but breaking attachments does not mean abandoning a loving and meaningful relationship, a relationship that nourishes your soul. It means ending dependency on any person or thing. Love is never a dependency.

We must believe in ourselves, have patience with ourselves, and trust ourselves to do the best we can at any given time. We must know that no matter what, there is a spirit of the divine in our being that gives us the power to change instantly.



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